It’s catch-up time my friends!

If you have managed to read my last few posts, you’ll know we are on a bit of a rollercoaster as we try to balance the good with the bad which life has thrown at us recently. In amongst all of this of course, gardens grow and need attention, clothes are worn and need to be washed and of course, people get hungry and need to be fed.

I am not managing many trips to the allotment at the moment but that is mainly down to the weather. Yes, we were hit by storm Amy and a decision was made that nobody should be venturing too far. That also meant that my husband’s appointment for a CT scan had to be re-scheduled. Safety first though. The road we’d have to take is very exposed in some areas and tree covered in either – none of which appeal in strong winds. There are several bits of tree lying in the roads local to us so I’m not taking on a forest!

He wasn’t too disappointed though because it would have meant more radiation in just over a week, as last week he went for a scan which is called – and I’m not joking here – a nuclear medicine study. Now there’s a group of words that should never be in the same sentence.

I took him to the department and we sat in a waiting room (which you are told has higher levels of radiation due to what they do in that department). This did raise my anxiety levels somewhat.

Then hubby was taken away and they injected him with some sort of radioactive substance. I don’t understand this stuff to be honest, all I know is, according to the leaflet they send you, he then emits a level of radiation from his body and it was advised to keep at least 1 metre away from him for 24 hours. Although, if he was to travel, he might set off sensitive radiation detectors at airports and train stations for the next 2 WEEKS.

How safe is this, I wonder?

Weirdly, it was okay for us to go to the hospital cafe, which is what we did. They make a lovely cappuccino and I indulged in several.

I slept on the sofa that night. Well I say slept. I stayed up too late, with thoughts racing round my head, trying to get comfy and letting Scooby know he could go to sleep – he was on the other sofa. Wherever I sleep, he follows; I’m the giver of food after all.

So after getting a dose like that, he was relieved not to have to go and get radiated again as part of a fact finding mission. I do still wonder though that if the first test is so great as it lights up any cancer cells, why is another test needed anyway? But who am I to question things like this?

So home we stayed. I found my mind took to worrying about new things – like the fence being battered, again. We replaced a fence panel earlier this year but we don’t have the finances to do it again. Will the fence survive? My mind wouldn’t settle and I checked outside several times. It’s not so much that I want the fence but I need something to keep Scooby in the garden. He is an impulsive lad and wouldn’t think that leaving the garden would be a bad idea. Bless him.

So did the fence survive unscathed?

In a word, no.

I’ve blocked off what I can and I’m looking into ways I can get it sorted, cheaply.

What would you do with this mess? Bearing in mind, I don’t have the building skills needed or the finances which are probably needed in this sort of situation. I’m trying to keep my anxiety levels under control but it’s not easy. I’ve noticed I’m getting palpitations quite a lot now. The other night it went on for about 10 minutes. That can’t be good.

Just keep putting one foot in front of the other. Just keep moving forwards. Just keep going.

It’s becoming my mantra.