I had planned to do the writing challenge for the start of the year but I found I just couldn’t get it started. It has made me realise why I don’t really look back in time and get all reflective.

I know we are supposed to reflect and take time to think about what has happened and how we want to develop etc but every time I sat down to reflect all I could think about was the bad crap.

The stressful times, losing our friend to cancer, money problems etc – it all just came flooding in. So I didn’t write anything.

I’ve realised what I do reflect on however, is the garden. Yeah big surprise right?! This past year was a difficult one and I remind myself of that because the harvests weren’t great and I know a lot of people struggled in 2024 with their gardens.

I prefer to live in the now for the most part. I am setting goals and I have found a few tools to help me make them more concrete instead of having them just floating around my head aimlessly which will mean nothing gets done about them!

My main areas I will be working on are definitely going to include:

Garden – both at home and the allotment. We’ve been working on prepping the beds but the weather has put a pause on that for the moment. But I have plans! I also managed to get a special discount code with one of the UK seed companies! If you are in the UK go to https://budgetseeds.co.uk/ and use the code: SONEIL10 to get 10% off your order! How cool is that?

Me – I’ve had a bit of a rough year with the whole perimenopause thing. I’ve tried to ignore it best I could to be honest. Sick of the brain fog, memory loss, mood swings, joint pain, stiff shoulder oh and the weight. Let’s not forget the weight. Another reason I don’t ‘reflect’. I used to be slim and active so now I just feel like a blob who has to wear a tent to feel slightly comfortable as I roll and bounce from one room to the next. To say my self-esteem and self-image have taken a hit would be an incredible understatement. I think that’s one of the main things that has gotten me down over the year. The pain I can cope with. Hell I’ve had back pain for over 20 years, but not feeling like ‘me’ is something completely different.

House – I’m really going for it in the decluttering stakes and the good news is the family are really onboard for this one too. Already made a strong start, just need to keep the momentum going.

Online endeavours – I enjoy doing the blog. I’ve met a lot of lovely people and I like hearing what you are all up to or reading your creative posts. I like the community here, the support and knowing there is always someone around!

Around June 2024 I decided to take my YouTube channel on a different path. I’ve had one for a while and initially it was all going to be about the dog! I had no desire to be in the videos at all – back to the confidence thing. Then one day – and I don’t remember how it happened – I decided that if I was going to be at the allotment and working in the garden or using the harvest etc, I might as well show other people what I’m doing. It has been a slow growth but I am finding some lovely people there too and as my channel is so tiny I don’t get the haters – yet! But if you fancy coming over and subbing to see what I’m doing I’d love to have you!

The podcast however, is on unstable ground. I have no clue why I started it and I have no clue where it’s going! I have a few ideas for a couple more seasons and even though I enjoy doing it, it takes up more of my time than the other 2 combined. All the research, the note taking, the recording, the editing, then the distributing etc – it’s a lot. I shut down my Patreon as it wasn’t getting ANY traffic. My ‘buymeacoffee’ is still going but it is just sitting on a dusty shelf at the moment. I do have plans to put more printables etc on there at some time but haven’t been able to yet.

So at the moment, I’m considering if the podcast even has a future and I really don’t know either way at the moment.

That’s my main areas, other than home-school and family but I’m not including them here!

I really found this a difficult post, you know. I did a podcast episode recently about time perspectives. It’s been found that people who think in the past are more prone to depression and those who focus on the future are more prone to anxiety, for example, and I think in my case, that’s true. I avoid reflecting!

Anyway, I’ve babbled on long enough. I will be making a conscious effort with my goals for 2025 and I’d love to hear if you have a main goal or a couple you will be working on this year too.